I Can't Be Who You Are
by Annie D134
Summary: Isabella Swan is not human, and she hates it. She's never felt worthy of anything. What happens when she stumbles upon a human boy who wants nothing more for her than love and happiness? Will she learn to love or will she run away? In The world of immortality, nothing is worse than loneliness.
1. Preface

_**This is my first story so don't be judgmental.** _

Preface:

His eyes widened as he took in my posture and shuffled back towards the door. "You...can't. Please miss, I am begging you to reconsider, please...just think it through." His back was to the door now and his hand twitched toward the doorknob anxiously. I hated this part of me, this demon that did everthing to ruin me. I wanted nothing more than to take the boy in my arms and assure his safety, but _she_ wasn't going to let me. I knew I only had a small moment left to do this before _he_ came back to check up on me; but the only thing I could think to do is take a step back and cry. It was a long shot but I had to make myself seem weak, incapable of harm; I knew it worked when I saw the boy hesitated and slowly walked towards me.

That was all it took for _her_ to take over.

I looked at the boy, only a few feet away, and with as concentration as possible, I let out a small whisper.

"I'm sorry,"

**_I'm gonna try to upload everyday or at least every other day. So...see you tomorrow!_**


	2. 1 Devour

Chapter 1:

There are two sides to my everlasting immortality.

Me and her.

The much more tolerable side was Bella Swan, the sweet-hearted and young woman who you could talk to for hours on end without being bored. Bella Swan was, in a sense, the real me.

Then there was her.

The creature, the monster, who takes away the innoccence I wished I had everytime I cross the paths of anything human. Of course this creature was me; but everytime she came through, It never seemed like she was me. But that was for only one reason.

Bella Swan was human.

But this thing was something worse,

a devour.

A cruel and vile monster that fed on the innoccent youth of humans in order to maintain their-our-immortality. Devours are very close to something called a shinigami, which steals lifespans instead of youth. In my eyes, every collection of both species deserved nothing more than a slow painful death.

Even me.

No, especially me.

I had lived the span of two-hundred lives and almost everyday had taken what little control I still had to not throw myself off the highest cliff in Forks, Washington. But there were things that somewhat helped me forget what I was, even for a little while. The facination I had for art, music and human culture was undenialable. The way humans lived their individual lives had never ceased to amaze me, especially with the new technology that even children could control.

But then again, what couldn't they control?

I sighed, my benign attitude gone as my turquoise eyes took in the last of the late sunset. According to the humans, I had lived in Forks for papable length of three days; trying to adjust to rainy days and cloudy skies. But in reality, I'd lived here for ten years.

Ten long, agonizingly boring years.

I tried to abide excuse I told myself, if I had come sooner with humans dying at my own selfish hands, people would get suspicious. Of course it would sound reasonable in anyone else's ears, but for me, I was just terrified to be near any humans. Too terrified at myself, too terrified of my reactions if someone stepped too close, or touched my skin...

I shook my head, my long caramel hair brushing my waist. I wasn't doubting my self control, no, I wouldn't dream of that.

But I did doubt the humans' saftey near me.


	3. 2 Hesitation

**Sorry I haven't been uploading, but I didn't know how to continue. But now, I've got a clear picture on what will happen. **

"Bella?"

I looked down from the tree branch I sat on, but I couldn't see anything. I shrugged, convincing myself that the voice was probably one of imagination.

"Bella, I know you can hear me." I gasped, this time the voice came from behind me. I clutched the branch tightly and turned my head to look at the most annoying boy in history. My younger beast of a brother, Seth, stared back at me; the look in his eyes told me he was barely holding back laughter.

Yeah, this was probably the worst part of immortality.

Enduring the never-ending torture of having an immature brother.

My expression must have resembled something of a glare as he lifted his hand up in surrender, the laughter finally escaping him. "Hey, you were asking for it; maybe you should've answered back." My eyes narrowed at his carefree tone and I exhaled sharply through my nose. I ignored his still smiling face and looked him in the eyes, turquoise versus chartreuse. "What do you want? In case you didn't notice, I was busy doing something," I lied, hoping he'd leave me be. He stared me down, all joking signs gone. "What could you have possibly been doing that makes you,"-he used air quotes-"busy?"

"Breathing."

"Really? You'd call 'breathing' busy work?"

Yep.

He rolled his eyes when I didn't answer, he rested the hand that wasn't holding him to the tree trunk on mine. "You know you don't have to go with me, right? I'm not making you or anything. You just say the word and we'll get out of Forks and go somewhere more secluded, like...um, I can't think of anything right now, but we will..." I chucked at his endless rambling and reached out to mess up his golden locks. He grimaced at my chance to distract him and I nodded in answer. After all, I was the older sibling, just because I couldn't handle it, it didn't mean we couldn't stay. Seth watched my face for hesitation and, when he found none, rose an eyebrow in question. "So, you gonna' give me a smile or what?" I smiled widely at his blunt sarcasim and pushed him hard enough to fall from the tree. Unfortunately, his grip on the tree was tight enough to keep him still and he smiled widely at my attempt to make him fall.

" Well, C'mon big sis, let go to high school."

Oh, boy.

**What do you think will happen? By the way, after this chapter I'm going to start putting song names as the title as a theme song-type-of-thing. Alrighty, see ya later**


	4. Sorry

i'm sorry to annouce this but, I have to cancel this story

NO, don't kill me!

Anyway, I don't see this story going anywhere, but either today or in a few days I'll be introducing a new romance novel called "Almost Is Never Enough" This story will actually happen and i promise to make it good. Sorrym if I've angered anyone out there.


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